Bollywood legend Sridevi's death has left us numb and speechless. Her aura and personality is irreplaceable. Today as the world mourns, shares grief and offers prayers on all mediums, one such article or message is being circulated, which I feel is a disgraceful and mean, as the author points out something, which I believe he/she is not directly related to in any manner. The intention and the message behind writing this article may be to pass and create awareness. However, the words chosen and the emotions shared in the message are utterly mean, rude and bitter.
Here’s what Piyali Ganguly wrote
Her implants, weight loss and excess doses of Botox shots regularly could also be the cause of Cardiac arrest.
While we are all mourning the untimely demise of Sridevi, it is important to remember why this may have happened to her. Society demanded that she stay slimmer/look younger than a 40 year old, 50 year old and plus 50 woman needs to be. Hence, the continuous surgeries. When I met her about 5 years ago, she was beautiful but a sad version of that self that we loved so much in a movie like Chandni. What a lot of pressure to keep her weight down, to make sure that her face had no wrinkle lines, continuous clinic visits in Southern California. As a friend of mine, Dipanwita Basu wrote this morning, do we need a #metoo movement in fashion, #notsize0? Milan has already implemented this but these patriarchical implants were in her head -- the husband, who claimed to love her so much should have intervened, did he love the way she looked as his arm candy more than he loved her? She herself did not trust in her own beauty -- she was a clothes horse for whoever would care to dress her. What I conclude is she had such a lack of love for oneself and such a lack of self-esteem that her own lips didn't suffice, her own face was not good enough, her flesh and blood had to be sucked out of her so that she could wear the best of couture. That is the sadness of a life that could have been lived so much better not just for her but for her daughters. What a terrible legacy for her girls.
What irks me is the language used in the communication here, as it clearly reflects the emotion she wanted to share! Accepted, that she was moved by this news too, but the mind wanders to the surgeries and additional factors which not only Sridevi, but a million other people in the world also are used to.
My point is if a treatment of any kind is clinically available, and being offered by popular verified doctors, and given only at the discretion of some warnings and conditions, what is the worry! Isn’t choosing a way to live, a personal choice? What is wrong if one chooses implants, shots or any form of medication or treatment to make themselves feel good and confident. As a mere spectator, one only has the right to share awareness, and not use bitter, harsh and shallow words like the ones mentioned in the article.
The author, Piyali, does not in any manner, have the right to question what Sridevi’s husband Boney Kapoor thought or should have done.
“Milan has already implemented this but these patriarchical implants were in her head -- the husband, who claimed to love her so much should have intervened, did he love the way she looked as his arm candy more than he loved her?”
As disturbing as these lines are, Piyali’s statements here question a bond between two people, she has no direct relation with. Questioning one’s integrity on love and emotions, and calling someone as an ‘arm candy’ is shameful!
What disturbed me the most are these lines, which I’m sure many like me, who looked up to her for her style and fashion, would agree with my thoughts.
“She herself did not trust in her own beauty -- she was a clothes horse for whoever would care to dress her. What I conclude is she had such a lack of love for oneself and such a lack of self-esteem that her own lips didn't suffice, her own face was not good enough, her flesh and blood had to be sucked out of her so that she could wear the best of couture.”
The way one wants to carry oneself in any clothes, offered or bought, is one’s opinion and choice. Today, many of us choose to lose weight as we want to look better, fit and fabulous. Being an icon and superstar, Sridevi inspired many of us with the aura she carried, irrespective of her age. She was someone who everyone was impressed with and loved, ever since she was a child, for what she did was many who wished to, and do wish even today.
And about the last few lines…
"That is the sadness of a life that could have been lived so much better not just for her but for her daughters. What a terrible legacy for her girls."
Dear Piyali. It was her life and her daughters, and the way they have grown and groomed is something we all have seen. Talking about the life being better, it always was for Sridevi, and let's leave it to that! A massive cardiac arrest is an unfortunate incident to happen, which took her away from all of us. But the reason for this is unknown and I’m sure, it is not what you have mentioned. And mind you, legacy is something she has left, for the whole fraternity and the world thinks she is irreplaceable, for what she delivered in her career and life. So people like you, who show interest in interrogating in others’ life, unfortunately after death (or on the same day) should look into yours and see if you are preparing yourself to leave behind something which you and your beloved circle will be proud of. With this article, I certainly do not think so!
Sadly, views like this, add a lot of bitterness and hatred in lives. Rather than sharing the message, you focused to point out something which is ‘NONE OF YOUR CONCERN.’ The words you chose, the way you communicated, sadly is shallow, disgraceful, mean and filthy. Stop poking into people’s business. If you want to share something, there are better words to choose and a better way to share!
PS: Even if you knew Sridevi and were related to her up, close and personal, this is not the right time, or day, or the way to communicate a message. Sorry! It is way too bad!
Note: The views expressed here are personal and that of the author.
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